megans night :)

must have been so good that she couldnt even make it into work today to tell us about it :)

juanes is

a colombian singer who's from the same city that i'm from. i love his music! he won a ton of latin grammys the year he realeased his first album - i think it was in 2000 or 2001. his music is spanish rock/pop. he had a song with nelly furtado, fotografia, that was really popular. he also has a re-mix now with black eyed peas, la paga, but i haven't heard that one much. i have all his music, nush! remind me, and i'll play it for you this weekend :)

i'll be in boston the weekend of march 6

who is juanes

i was just kidding about the muse :) i just watched the sex and the city episode where miranda gets so pissed that all they ever talk about is boys...i love hbo on demand.

i cant go to boston the weekend i was planning on...a cousin of mine is coming from india and will be either in CT/NY/or Philly that weekend depending on mine/sashanks plans...so my trip to boston has to be postponed to feb or march sometime...

no! i don't need a boy to make me happy

i'm my own muse! maybe it's also because it finally stopped raining. and i REALLY am excited about my lil' buddy, julia. and it's great to have my daddy back in the states.

and i don't know, i guess a lot of guy friends have been calling / emailing me lately, so it's nice to get attention once in a while. nothing special, but it's just nice :)

haven't heard much from peter recently. i don't think he's too excited with me, but oh well :(

oh yea, and i'm going to a juanes concert in boston in march! i LOVE juanes! :)

?

jules did you profess your love for peter during lunch and have him shyly reciprocrat then cutely give him a peck on the lips? seems like thats what put rupa in the good mood on wednesday....who is your muse?

jules!!!

she is in SUCH a good mood today. and she's glowing.. it's so cute :) i can't wait to have an ipod again!! happy friday everyone. now i'm leaving. :)

still here...

i'm finishing up the blog that moush and i are making for him :)

plus he was weird about me coming over

so i'm just drop by later.. show him how to use the blog, give him the journal i got him and leave.

:)

its nice to hear/read so much happiness in your day jules! think its cause your dad is back?

i cant wait to get a computer so i can add/change songs/playlists! its so annoying to have an ipod and to only have put music on it the very first day....plus i def want to bring my computer over to rupas some sunday and transfer her songs to my computer during desparate housewives :)

why I love ipods:

I have it on random, so I listen to a wide variety of music all day, every day. tiny dancer just came up, and I immediately thought of megan! I think your mom likes that song, right meg? and yesteday I totally cheered up when I heard madonna's papa don't preach. it was my fav song when I was little :)

rups - the pics are cute! i love pictures, too.

i think i just love everything today :)

why are you still blogging?

go see him!

why are you still blogging?

go see him!

pics

i downloaded all the pics off moush's camera yesterday b/c we are making ameya a blog (like this one!!!) where he can post pics and stories from his trip.. and we are starting it off with our picture of him.

here is the picture of him that we are using:



here are some other pics from halloween and one of my dress!! :)

thats awesome!

brings back memories of teach a child to read trips down mass ave together...

im going to go do pilates now during lunch...haev fun at lunch :) feel free to transcribe the conversation and post it to the blog :)

GREAT news!

i just found out who my lil' buddy will be! i won't get to meet her until the end of the month, but diana, the head of the program, called me this morning super excited to tell me that she found me the perfect match.

her name is julia vega, she's 7 years old and lives in brooklyn. diana spent an afternoon at her house, and she said julia is a really active little girl. she loves to color and paint, she loves to sing, she loves going out. her favorite singer is shakira! julia is bi-lingual, but her mom only speaks spanish. her favorite class at school is lunchtime :) she loves to play with people's hair. . .

i can't wait to meet her! megan, i don't remember if i've told you about this buddy program i'm volunteering for. they match us up with a child who's parent is terminally ill, and we're just supposed to hang out with them a couple of times a month. the whole interview/orientation process took place last month. orientation was like 2 whole days, but it's cool because diana really gets a good feel for what we're like, and then they try to find a child who's personality would be a good fit.

anyways, that's my great news for the day. i'm in the best mood now!

rups - i'm glad you're in a good mood too! can't wait for lunch in an hour :)

nush, i think the 20th will work. let me check with jackie, and then i'll call and make appts for us in the evening.

megan - how was your night???

Girls

moon: i can go from jan 10-jan 25 :) hopefulyl one of those days works for you guys...maybe thurs the 13th or thurs the 20?

rupa - you are amazing. when dev and i were walking to the subway i was saying how i felt sad for you and even though im happy things worked out this way the timing is just so frustrating. and he was like you have to try to focus and remind her that what she got was one of the best feelings in life - validation of your feelings. he was like imagine what it would have been like if she didnt have that talk at lunch and its so much easier said than done but thats what you/she should remember. i think thats totally right.

you are such an optimistic person - or at least are able to find the little hope/optimism in a situation like that - that takes character. being able to step back and realize all the things you can do in this next year (hanging out at 63 sullivan more often :) etc) and thinking about when you can make a trip out there i think will be really good for you...

what was the conversation about this afternoon - you said he was weird about it? what time is the fam coming in?

megan - how was the 1 year anniv??

i'm here!

hi people...

i'm in the office this morning.. although i'm gonna leave around noonish i think and go visit. he is home today packing but his family is coming in early so he was kinda weird about me spending the afternoon..

i had a really good night... for a while i was all about trying to talk to him and be with him and it was a lil awkward b/c there were just so many people that wanted to see him. but that's why it's great to have my lovely ladies by my side :) to entertain me and push me a lil. thanks girls! you three really are the best!

erica hung out for a while longer actually.. which was nice b/c he was still busy talking to people and that indian guy started up again with the whole.. you're so pretty.. why won't you talk to me.. blah blah blah. poor erica.. i think i pawned him off on her a lot and walked away. by the end of the night, steve-o jeremy and all the others had left. the only ones there were his work people- the indian guy, his boss, and that guy steve.. who i love!! megan- although i don't know carebear's personality at all.. this guy reminds me of him physically.. both in terms of stature but also in terms of being really smily and huggable. he's my favorite of ameya's work colleagues. so i spent most of the time talking to him and listening to ameya's boss tell me about how he's gonna go to india in march to visit ameya and find him a wife. i didn't want to correct him :) so i just laughed along about all his ideas (including renting out the delhi convention center and having an ameya party). crazy man...

so then erica left too and i was bonding with steve while ameya and ray (the boss) had this total heart to heart.. the boss was super sad by the end of the night.. which worried me a lil b/c ameya started talking about going back to this horrible job after a year!!!!

ok.. so end of night (i know you are all curious). everyone else left.. and it was the two of us.. and he was like.. i have to get home.. i still have to do some packing tonight and then tomorrow.. so we walked outside.. i was gonna hop in a cab and go home but we decided to walk around a lil... he apologized for not really getting to talk to me, but i told him it was fine.. that he needed to see all those others that he didn't get to see at all. finally we walked me a bit uptown and then i started to hail a cab. we hugged for about a minute.. he said... this isn't bye yet, i'll see you tomorrow, and we just ended up standing there and talking for maybe 20 minutes. finally i was cold.. sad.. and wanted to leave. it was sad.. we didn't say much but just kinda stood there for a bit- i went to kiss him and he kinda turned away. then he said "sorry.. i know i'm being a jerk, but i can't do this.. it's already really hard". and he's right! yeah i wanted a kiss.. but making it all romantic before he leaves will make it worse.. and i totally told him before that i wanted the opposite.. to just be how we've been and then deal with it when he's back.

so i'm gonna stick to that. my cab ride home was really sad.. but i woke up today.. am in a great mood and am over this kissing bit.

honestly, if he were here for the next year, i don't know if i'd be ready for a full blown relationship. i still like having nights to myself and not having the obligation to call someone or let someone know where i am all the time.. i am finally figuring out a way to do my job but also have a life.. do things to my apt.. hang out with my friends. so i'm gonna have a really fun year doing all those things single.. just like i planned... and then i can be all sappy and romantic when he's back.. it's pointless to be that now.. it just makes me sad.

taht's my big epiphany of the day. and it's friday!!! :)

misc stuff

the cable check goes to jackie, i get utilities. so you can give me $37 for utilities for dec + $10 for netflix for this month.

i don't know how much fresh direct was, i have to ask jackie, but she was the one that paid for that.

and haircuts: jackie actually wanted to go at the end of this month. how's the moon cycle? i don't think she's going to want to wait until mid-feb to do it. . .

good morning

i had a fun night too...i left around 12 i think? rupa still hadnt talked to him much...i walked dev to the subway and took a cab home - i like that we can do things independently now - i like that he understands that sometimes i just want to sleep and thats ok :) im gonna go to a pilates class during lunch today. then to my cousins tonight.

eggs are a good idea - i was going to go on my way home but ill just get them next time :) maybe even 2 dozen would be good since we are all home this weekend...there are still the eggbeaters but i prefer just regular eggs...

im going to write you the check tomorrow - sorry i keep forgetting! and now its friday and along with the stupid haircutting rules im not allowed to write checks on friday...so ill do it for the cable + 10 for netflix for january? and do you know how much freshdirect was and that goes to jackie right?

speaking of haircuts - feb right?? i know thats far away (which shouldnt surprise you) but my hair is starting to feel gross so i just wanted to make sure :) im gone for the first two weeks of feb, but maybe the week after i get back...

buenos dias!

i think our good friend rupa might be feeling a bit sick today, so i don't know if we'll be hearing about her night.

ameya's going away party was nice - there were tons of people there. meg, a bunch of us pitched in to buy him a digital camera, so that was really nice. jackie and i left kind of early, so i don't know how the night ended. while we were there, there were just too many people around for her to really get to hang out with him.

nush - i'm going to the grocery store today to pick up more eggs (we didn't realize how fast we'd be going through them w/3 of us + occasionally dev), soap for the dishwasher, and stuff to make dinner tonight. can you think of anything else we might need?

sounds wonderful :)

63 sullivan instead of whatever sullivan moush lives at - she was wrong! so we should get more of you!!! :)

sounds fun

i finished my closet so my big plan is to put all the clothes away...

and then to keep busy so i don't get sad that he's leaving.. so you might see a lot of me at 63 sullivan!!!

this weekend

no real big plans for the weekend, i definitely need to unpack and organize my closet a little bit.

on saturday afternoon, jackie and i are going shopping in jersey with peter - there's this mall close to peter's new apt which is supposed to be really good. jackie needs a dress for her company party, and i'm going along for the ride. as of right now, i'm wearing mari's red dress again (the same one i wore to my company party), but i might buy something if i see a dress i really like.

other than that, my bro and my dad want me to work on some stuff for them, so i might hole up in starbucks for a lot of the weekend. . .

oh yea, and i'm watching hidalgo with my roomies :)

boys and plans

so - here's my two cents on the dev thing.
keep your eyes open - be judgemental about the relationship; but both how he's treating it AND how you are treating it. it shouldn't be a *routine* or i've put this much into it, might as well stick around for a really good reason to break up - it should be something you look forward to everyday (or at least most days - no one is desirable EVERY day :) it you keep all that in mind and it works out - great. and if it doesn't, no regrets :)

weekend plans? none. jess comes back on sunday. laundry? i think that's about it. i'm boring :)

weekend plans

1. watch hidalgo with j+j (and rupa if you want to come over...)
2. watch desparate housewives at rupas (too bad megan and guac wont be there this time!! im pretty sure avocados are not allowed in this diet...)
3. maybe going home sunday but i think its such a bad idea..i just have to convince my mom of that as well...

everyone else?

frank is def what i want to hear

and i know that...but at the same time i think that while i may be giving, i am never forgiving - and i think that is more of a problem in all aspects/relationships in my life..i think i am equally at fault for the "surface" type conversations because i am a very nit picky person - especially with him.

i just know that i dont want to walk away from this whole experience/relationship without giving it this one last try when things may have finally been figured out - like i told him/ellen/and most importantly myself - i am ok with having differences of opinions on many of the things we have had differeing opinions on in the past - money/ex girfriend etc...those are things and conversations that would never be easy and will take time to figure out. i am not ok with all the other drama.

i dont think i have much to lose if i dont give it another chance except more of my time and more of my effort but i am willing to give that up for the chance that it could work...

the one thing i am most afraid of is i dont want to change the effort i put in and i never want that to morph into being nonchalant about the relationship - if that happens and my heart isnt in it anymore i promise ill move on...its never easy to make a decision like this and i think when i do make it i want to make it once and for all which i know is wishful thinking and will prob never happen...but at least one more chance...

jules the printer shipped today but the computer wont come for another 2 weeks :)

hmmm....

i have mixed opinions about this.. my honest gut reaction (which i hope you want!) is that this is a bad idea.. where you putting the relationship and him above you.. but in the end, we always have to do what we think is right.. not what we think we are "supposed" to do.

but, nush, if you stay with him, then make sure this time is different. you don't deserve to have to sit there and defend all of your habits and idiosyncracies.. i think i told him this that drunken night.. but it seems like he wants to argue the surface stuff.. like "why do i have to call everyday" instead of "why doesn't he want to call everyday". if you feel like you aren't actually talking about the real issues when you are working stuff out and you are instead talking about the surface stuff, then i would walk away.

i hope me being frank is ok.. and it doesn't sound like a lecture.

i know you know better than anyone what is right for you.. but i think you are really giving in this relationship.. and someone needs to remind you that the first person to take care of is yourself!!! :)

oh yea,

nush, when do you get the computer??

re: anusha's views on life

hey nush, if that's the way you feel then it really shouldn't matter what your friends and family think about your relationship. nobody really knows what's going on in your relationship besides the two of you anyways, so go for it! we all just want you to be happy :)

i didn't do anything with my hair - all i did was blow dry it. maybe it's because my hair's been gross and in a pony-tail all week, so it looks nicer today in comparison!

day 3 of south beach is still working well. the real test will be eating out tonight and going to a bar. i'm going to try to stick to the no-alcohol rule for the first 2 weeks. wish me luck!

oh yea, i forgot to tell you guys about the joe situation. he definitely does not know how to talk to girls - major turn off. so i called him last night, seeing as the party is next friday and he had mentioned he wanted to take me out, but i haven't heard from him. we chatted for a bit, finally i was like, "so, you wanna hang out sometime, or what?". he got all nervous and he was like "yea, i think i'm going to some bars with some friends on friday. maybe i'll give you a call so you can meet up wtih us". but he was really nervous and stuff while he was trying to say this. i was like, "fine, call me, whatever." but, that doesn't sound like real definite plans to me, right? this morning, he told jackie that we were definitely hanging out on friday, blah blah blah. whatever happened to him wanting to take me out to dinner?? oh yea, when we spoke on the phone, he also said something about me going to their party, but he never really "asked" me to go with him. i think i'm just going to be jackie's date and joe can go alone.

i just get frustrated with guys who are wimps :)

my views on my life...

1. i just got to work :) the guys had to come fix my heater today so i got to sleep in and i just feel well rested and ready for the 1.5 days of work left that i have :)

2. dev.
i dont want to go into too much detail cause there is just too much to write about, but ive done a lot of thinking over the past 3 weeks and i had decided that i wanted to end it based on the last few months of complete miscommunication/misunderstanding/lots of bad stuff...which for the 3 weeks that i was apart and every time i talk to my friends/family seemed like breaking up with him was the only solution that made sense. last night i went to ellens and on my walk tehre and during our whole conversation about it i started to think that maybe for someone who matters to me as much as he does and has for the last year and a half and someone who forgives me when i do the most unacceptable things and he still is able to look me in the eye and tell me he loves me unconditionally and that he knows and i know that i screwed up but he also knows that we both are young and have a lot of growing up to do...

anyway long story short, after a series of us tryign to explain eachother i realized that this will be my first chance to live in the same city and have time for eachother and we have learned from issues like him travelling and not calling and have started to find solutions to it, and me studying and knowing thatll happen again in a month...but even so i think we have grown a lot and i think i would constantly ask myself what if i did give it another chance if i didnt give it this chance one more time. if it doesnt work then ce la vie (or however you spell that :)) but if it does than all this growing up together should be work it right?

i am perfectly aware that maybe im just giving in to his convincing comments and that i may get more hurt or i may be closing other doors of opportunity around me - but at the same time if i just give up now when i do believe there is potential to make it work - that it is possible for me to direct my efforts into the relationship in a different way that works better - than i may be closing the door to this opportunity too fast...

anyway i guess that wasnt as short and to the point as maybe it could have been but im just going to post it anyway...

rups - the menu looks awesome! im excited.
megan - what are the plans to celebrate?
jules - what did you do to your hair??? im glad you like the computer :) i cant wait!

that place looks good :)

oh, big cities . . . :)
i ate fine rochester cuisine last night. yup, that's right - wendy's :)
BUT tonight edgar has a whole thing planned out - including martinis :) he took notes and we went out last night and purchased the makings for a regular espresso martini as well as an espresso martini that also has baileys and frangelico :)

i'm pretty excited. i got him what basically is a big paper weight. its a round clear blue glass thing about the size of a cd or a little smaller with the chinese figure for happiness carved in it twice (which means double happiness or good fortune for a couple) i wanted to get him the one that said love, but all they had was a small one that was a solid pink color. we saw them together in this cool store a while back and he was all excited looking at the chinese figures and translating :)

one year!

wow.. one year... that's awesome. congrats! i hope you have a fun anniversary and lots of sex :)

nush- dinner tonight is at esperanto- this place that i love love love in the east village

congrats on your anniversary!

wow - 1 year is a LONG time. and nush, 1.5 years is even longer! i like the computer you're getting. i'm excited for you!

rupa, thanks for posting the link to her computer, and thanks for the compliment! my horoscope today said that i'm like a magnet, and that i'll be attracting lots of people today. looks like it was right! both you and ellie have complimented me so far :)

every single muscle in my legs hurts soo bad! i don't even want to move :( too bad i have to go almost all the way home now for a derm appt at 1. blah. oh well, at least i'm looking forward to dinner with the girls tonight, and then ameya's going away party!

meg, we'll miss you!

sorry girls :(

i just found out that i have a load of blood to deal with tomorrow . . . can't come tonight :(

plus - tonight is when edgar and i are going to celebrate our anniversary (its officially tomorrow) yup. one year. :)

ok. today i need to be productive. i'll start with making a list of what i need to accomplish :)

hi girls!

i just saw jules a lil bit ago and she looks great today! jules, i like your hair like that. i didn't go to ameya's last night.. he was doing a roommate thing where they went to dinner and were bonding.. he invited me over but i didn't really want to intrude on the roomie-only goodbyes. i'll see him tonight :) and i'm thinking about calling in sick tomorrow and hanging out with him while he packs...

here's a link to nush's computer..


with a downgrade to celeron processor, upgrade to bright screen, upgrade to 1 gb memory, and the two year service plan...


that is as long as she got the same one she emailed me about :) which i think she did. megan i wish you would really come tonight!!!

anyone have exciting plans for the weekend?

good morning, ladies!

nush - i want to see which computer you got! send me a link or email. also, thanks for making me those copies of the south beach book :)

rupa - did you see ameya yesterday?? is his ipod working??

meg - at what time shall we be expecting you for his going away party tonight? ;)

yup :)

since i got this i got most of the upgrades i wanted and it was still only 1150! an early bonus present to myself... :)

im going home then to gym then to ellens...rupa think of south beach friendly places for dinner for tomorrow night :) ill work out in the morning so i can just come straight to your office after work...

yay

congrats! now you can start collecting music and blogging from home :) ha ha

the bright screen will be awesome. you got the bright screen right?

i'm NOT being productive today. should i just go home?

i bought an HP

the value i was getting was soo much better for the price. and all the reviews i read have been positive - no complaints on battery ect...free printer, free cdr/dvd drive, etc etc...

it gets here in 2 weeks :)

hell no

i wish.. but considering that he's the guy who just quit the high paying corporate job to do non-profit work.. that i'm gonna be the sugarmomma in this relationship.

and i love you all.. but i'd much rather fly you here tomorrow then all of us to india...

on second thought.. that would be fun!!! we could all go see him and then nush and i can show you around!

wait, he's not flying us all to india?

you know, as the friends of his newly discovered love of his life - i thought he'd be buying 4 first class tickets to india to visit him/meet him for his girlfriends birthday . . .

wow. he's already disappointing me ;)

you are a twisted person megan

but thats why we love you :)

i wasnt a whimp! i did it too...i just dont think i was able to just definitively say its over...

back to rupa gloating! megan want to come up for the surprise party on thursday?? :) you dont want to go a whole year without meeting ameya do you?

i LOVE it!!!

oh, thats the perfect way for it to work out :)
you guys can be a happy (albeit rather awkward) couple at his going away party and poo to people like his sister and moush who thought they could get in the way!
so happy :)

see anusha - fate rewards those who are not gutless wimps.

julie, maybe you should pass that on to joe . . OR we could play a twisted pavlovian experiment on him and see if you can reward him (not dirty or pimping you out - a little kiss or any positive attention!!!!) when he acts confidently and ignore him when he's not . . . i think it would be fun :)

sorry sorry

forgot the last part...

we walked to his office.. had a nice not awkward hug.. and then i started walking to my office and then i ran back quickly.. true elementary-school-love-on-the-playground style and pecked him on the lips.

then i ran away.

even when she says she cant talk to me i can still hear the smile in her voice!!!!

this is so exciting!!! no kiss? no awkward hug?? how did you leave? is there more time for you two to be alone (not that thats really possible in nyc) before he leaves?

i'm back

ok... so i got to his office and he said sorry but that he'd have to take a conference call from india at the beginning of lunch but it should only take a few minutes...

so i'm like ok.. i'll just wait until after he gets the call and it's over to talk to him so that we aren't interrupted.. so we are talking about his leaving and all the stuff he has to do and his phone is on the table b/c he is waiting for them to call... so the whole time i'm like shit i can't bring it up!

finally they take our entrees away and he still hasn't called.. and ameya asks for the check when they ask if we want anything else.. so i'm like.. shit what do i do.. by this point i'm thinking that maybe i shouldn't say anything b/c he's already so stressed about the stuff he needs to think about before he leaves..

and then finally i blurt it all out. the check's about to come and i basically say.. i'm sorry that the timing is so off on this.."i know you are about to leave but i can't wait a year and i need to tell you this.. i hope it doesn't hurt our friendship at all but i just want you to know what i'm thinking before you leave." then i say "the last few months my feelings for you have grown to a lot more than friendship and i just really like you.. i like spending time with you... (imagine a lot more cheesy blurting... not how i planned)

so he sits there stunned and silent.. and not smiling so i got really worried.. he just looked so shocked and i said i'm sorry to floor you with this.. i just wanted you to know. then he smiles (AHHH!!!!!!) and says.. i'm so glad you brought this up.. i'm been feeling the same way for a really long time

so then he gets really cute and cheesy.. he basically says that he didn't want to be the one to bring it up b/c he's the one that's leaving and that would be rude.. and he kept saying i'm sorry that i'm leaving... and he said he's glad that i feel the same.. and that he just likes spending time with me so much.. he likes that we can have fun together even when we are just doing nothing.. and he said he wakes up and just wants to talk to me.. and that it's been really hard to feel all of that and then know that he's leaving and then he said that a year will go fast and that i should visit him.. and he told me that his roommates have been telling him to say something.. and i told him that they have been telling me too... and then we both got really quiet and shy.. and he said what should we do.. he said i don't really know what should happen... and i told him we could just think about it in a year and be the way we are now.. which he agree.. it was just nice and cute and we spent the next few minutes making stupid conversation while smiling at each other shyly (so pathetic i know)... then he started saying how funny it was that we've known each other for so long but nothng ever happened... and he said.. you didn't even like me when i was a kid cuz i was a dork.. which is true! and then he said he's glad that we've spent so much time together recently.. that it makes leaving harder but it's just been a great few months. (he's SO sweet :) ) and then we walked to his office.. (julie- am i leaving anything out? i didn't mean to tell her first but i had to run there and squeal with someone and tell someone).. but i'm sure i missed some of the cheesy details so then at the end


YAY!!!!!! you guys are so so so awesome for getting me to tell him. i'm so glad i did!!! yay!!! i'm glowing and giddy... :)

optimism

thats one of my resolutions for 2005...

although for me optimism and crazy preposterous thoughts are still synonomous :)

rupa where are you?!?!?! no talking to julie on the phone/IM you have to blog!

desperate housewives

i tried watching it this past sunday and they were showing some other crap instead! i hate it when they do that!

oooh - way to be optimistic, nush! i hope you're right and they're out making out somewhere. . .

we should be patient

maybe there is a heavy duty make out session going on at whatever restaurant they are in :) no need to rush back to work if thats going on!!

speaking of all this relationship stuff...im def hooked on desparate housewives after that weekend megan was here :) sunday at 9 is going to be a regular event for me...or at 915 in rupas apt so we dont have to deal with commercials

oh, joe . . .

i'd be more willing to accept the lack of confidence if he wasn't assured of your response . . . or hadn't hung out with you that much . . . but DUDE! you've already said yes, all you need to do is call and confirm (it's only polite)

i'm super sleepy and very sad that the hospital doesn't sell pepsi products (i want a mountain dew . . .)

no switching votes!

sorry nush, too late. yea, sounds like joe is a bit wimpy. jackie says he's not very confident (which, i must admit, is a turn-off). oh well, maybe he's just shy and he'll get over it as soon as he sees that there's no reason to be intimidated by me!

nush, sorry the whole dev thing is so miserable :(

rupa - aren't you back from lunch yet???

i didnt get that part either...

you have to call joe today to ask if he is asking/taking you to the formal...maybe my vote goes to peter. is it too late for that? :)

rupa ill agree to the pact...we actually talked last night - which sucked cause i think after a year and a half and living in the same city we owe it to eachother to talk in person...but it was the same thing you and i talked about last night - that we will keep belaboring over the same crap and the bottom line is im not happy and there really shouldnt be any more conversation...i dont know how you hang up the phone after a conversation like that - so after like 3 hours he was just like well you have nothing else to say so im gonna go..i said id still like to talk in person to which he was catty and just frustrated and was like why i think youve made yourself perfectly clear...

so im not really sure what the status is...but i at least had the talk...who knows...

also, check out the email i sent you re the HP computer i was looking at...dev and ravi uncle thought it was a good deal...i want your seal of approval too :) i may just go ahead and buy it today...

jules im kinda worried that even if i haev a computer i wont have good internet access - i have no idea how that stupid wireless thing works!!!

urgh

i didnt blog about the convo earlier cause its just depressing and the same stuff over and over...so no more about this lets keep talking about rupas soap opera :)

rupa's soap opera

that's the way i feel too! and then i feel a little guilty - like, should i be WISHING for drama?? but then again - i really think she should tell him . . .

and joe bought your ticket and told jackie to tell you instead of calling you? wow. looks like he's a wimp too. maybe he should talk to rupa and anusha . .

oooh

is she at lunch now??? i can't wait for her to get back! i feel like i'm in watching a soap opera and they've just left us on a cliff hanger. . .

haha. silly rupa

she im'ed me like 2 days ago when jackie was using my computer, and i definitely told jackie to just ignore her. poor cari.

oh no!

i took my blocking off AIM for some crazy reason.. and now cari is IMing me!!! not only that.. but her first IM is.. hi.. how are you? do you have to go b/c you always have to leave when i IM you!!

ahhhh!!! i hate when excuses get worn out... :)

yay

i like the friends who kiss idea... :) and that joe already bought your formal ticket. when is that?

ok i'm gonna tell him. yay!!! you guys are awesome. nush- as a pact.. if i tell him.. then you HAVE to talk to dev by the end of the weekend.. which means even if you hang out saturday afternoon with him and it's so good you don't want to ruin it by having a talk.. ruin it!!! he's always gonna make it seem like it's the wrong time for a talk.

is that a deal? :)

i'ts only 10am

and i've already missed so much!

rups, i just tried to give you a pep talk on the phone, so i don't think there's much more i can add here. all i can say is TELL HIM, TELL HIM, TELL HIM!

and i love that we have this blog - and that you guys are so much better than me at writing in it! :)

and for the record: yes, anthony is such a girl! he's definitely an MIT guy. hmm, actually, though, don't girls eat MORE when they're depressed and stuff? so if he can't eat because of his emotions, then he's not really a girl, huh? oh well, either way, he's way too emotional and sensitive for a guy. or are we just not emotional and sensitive enough?

as a side note: i hate the weather here right now - i'm still in miami mode - i want to go back home!

oh yea - and spikey and i definitely don't have a long distance relationship! we're just friends. . .who kiss when we're in the same city :)

megan, you'll be happy to know that i have not spoken to joe, but he already purchased my ticket for their big formal company party, and he asked jackie to tell me. i should call him today for sure.

it wont fall apart!

as long as you dont get overly dramatic with him and you just tell him that you have those feelings/thoughts i think itll be fine and the friendship wont fall apart.

oh baby, dominate me!

GOOD MORNING ALL!

anthony is a girl. everyone let out a big sigh of relief that that one never took off!

so, i think you'll go nuts wondering if you don't say anything to him - which is not going to be fun. get it off your chest! if the friendship falls apart because of that conversation - it was doomed anyway. so go for it!

at a wedding

haven't heard anymore though.. he had to run to a meeting.

ok so maybe ameya won't hate me... :) but the ross thing really is a big risk yeah? as in waiting for a year isn't a good idea? thanks for all the help girls :) sorry to dominate the blog

HAHA

did he meet a new girl in vermont? (is that the state he is in...)

off topic

but i had to share... this is anthony being such a girl.. can you believe i once wanted some of that? ;)

r u p i e land: how are you?
faslinVT: meanie...
faslinVT: im ok... :-r u p i e land: awww
faslinVT: girl problems...
r u p i e land: you feeling better?
r u p i e land: of course
faslinVT: yeah im feeling better...
faslinVT: i still can't eat...
faslinVT: but im not sure if its because of my emotions or because i might still be sick...
r u p i e land: whoa
r u p i e land: that kind of girl trouble
r u p i e land: ? :-)


Who SAYS that?? :)

best kiss

i pre nominate you and ameya for this :)

i of all people know that things are a lot easier for your friends to tell you than for you to actually do/think...but i think you have absolutely nothing to worry about for those 4 concerns...
1. he loves you. if not more than a friend, at least as a friend. which means he will not think you are a freak and he clearly is showing flirtatious tendancies so i dont think he will get nervous...
2. ameya - mad?? i def dont know him that well but that description doesnt seem plausible...he may get frustrated that you brought it up - as you prob will be. i think that professing something like that right before he leaves just will stir up emotion that has no where to go since he is leaving...but other than that he wont get mad. and like ross, its better to tell him than to just let it slip away!
3. he isnt metrosexual enough to be gay
4. he is related to moush! remind him of that subtly :) haha but honestly if you were pushing them to date since we all moved here, it prob would have happened already...

was that pep talky enough???

i'm a wimp

and it was ipod hell when i got there... moush never came over.. but jeremy, steve, and claire were all helping him out when i got there... we were finally alone by 1am or so (still there!) but his computer (not ipod) was really frustrating.. so both of us were grumpy and i was kinda having trouble staying awake... (AND i'm a wimp)

so i figured i'd talk to him today over lunch... blah. but after seeing how stressed he is about leaving.. i worry. maybe i shouldn't say anything?? i'm having lunch at noon so i need 3 hours of pep talks!!! all the things that i am worried about...
1. that he'll look at me like i'm a freak and get nervous that i like him
2. that he'll like me too but be mad that i brought this up right when he's leaving
3. that he'll tell me he's gay
4. that he's in love with moush.. or insert any other name

i worry that he's gonna do 1 or 2 more than anything... and then our friendship will wither away... help!!!!

rups how did it go???

megan rupa came over last night for a little bit and julie and i tried to reverse moushs conversation with rupa...im not sure if we were successful or not...guess well have to wait for miss rupa to blog...

i don't think so

:)

you dont think shed tell him do you???

she = moush?

long distance

rupa and ameya...
julie and spikey...
megan and edgar once she moves to NYC for vet schools :)

sounds ok with me...

rupa - ill work out here, come meet you at your office then we can take the subway to my apt together? sound good? and next week ill come to your place...

i have no more opinion on the computer either :) therefore ill postpone it yet again...

will she stay there till 10? you should go there after she leaves...cause if you go when she is still there, the kiss still wont happen :) and shell never leave if she knows you are there....

dinner

you should go to the gym here so you can come up to my apt! i finally did my closet so you can come see that too :) it's hard to turn down movies and starving girls though...

don't take the tablet pc from dev.. he'll probably hold that over your head as another thing he's done for you... and you don't need that.

i don't know if i'm getting an alone dinner with ameya although i think we are still having lunch.. he just called and apparently she's going over there at 7ish to hang out while he packs.. but he asked that i come over later and help him figure out the ipod and help burn music etc... which i'm happy to do.. but i don't want to be there when she is. isn't this strange? i love them both.. but when it's the 3 of us.. she talks a lot more than i do so i just stay quiet and am not myself. i think i'll go there at 10 or so and help him out. i should try and get a dinner though before he leaves- tomorrow he's doing a roommates thing and then thursday he has a work thing. i think it's really only lunches that are left :)

so yeah.. i guess it makes more sense for me to come over and then head to his place than for you to come up nush- jules are you around tonight too?

i'm gonna keep up this once a week thing for us (even two weeks)!!!! new years resolution for all of us.. is that the NYC girls see each other than we see the rochester girl.. no offense megan!!

i don't have more advice on the computer..

megan- how's the vetschool prep going? any word on possibilities of ending up closer to us? :)

2 weeks?!?!?1

you tricked me and said only one week!!! phase 1 lasts for two weeks!!!

urgh im going to die......but maybe ill lose a few pounds in the process...

i agree with megan and rupa

you can't go from powerbook/ibook to dell! actually, i've also heard of a lot of people who have had problems with their dell battery, so def get the warranty if you do get it. but rupa seems to have good alternatives if you don't want to pay for an ibook, although, if you're not going to be using it a lot, you don't need all that capacity anywyas, so just get an ibook!

more on spikey: he is involved in his son's life. he actually brought him to the movies with a bunch of us one night. it's the only time i've met him - his name's gavin. we all hung out and got food before the movie, then when we got to the theater spikey was sitting next to me and his son was sitting on the other side of him. before the movie started, gavin kept whispering to him that he wanted spikey to switch seats with him. spikey was like: "why, do you want to sit next to the girls? tell me why you want to switch seats, if not i won't switch with you." gavin was too embarrased to tell him why he wanted to sit next to me so they didn't switch, but it was cute.

i don't remember what his major was, i don't know his gpa. he works for carnival - he's a personal vacation planner (same as what peter used to do). out of 500 sales people he's the 3rd best seller, so i guess he's good at what he does. i don't know what his long term goals are. i know, i know: carnival salesman isn't very ambitious, but oh well.

and rups, i def like your idea of hanging out with spikey when i'm home and dating joe when i'm here. i talked to peter a bit while i was on vacation and stuff, but after my vacation i'm def convinced that i don't want to date him right now. i don't think he feels the same way, though. he gave me this really cute pic of the two of us that was taken when we were 19! it's hard to believe that we've been friends for soo long.

yumm - brownies sound really yummy right now. nush, jackie, and i all started the south beach diet today, so absolutely no sugar and carbs for 2 weeks. blah.

doesn't she have a boyfriend?

how long have you two known ameya?
i don't think i'm going to accomplish anything else today. which is pretty sad. i think i only accomplish about 4 hours of work in any 8 hour day. which i don't really like . . . but i don't know what to do about it. ohwell.

and next thursday is my first lab meeting! i'm really really nervous. they are going to ask me questions and i'm going to say "i don't know" and its going to be bad.

i think she was calling me the traitor :)

rups im going to go to the gym after work, but if you want i can go to the gym here and meet up with you after that? ill be sweaty and gross and im on the stupid south beach diet cause i live with j+j but i promise i can still be fun :) if i work out here ill be done and can be at your office/your apt by 8 or 815...

if you want to come to our place we have a wide array of movies/fun/depressed girls who cant eat :) if thats enticing to you...

this whole computer thing is driving me nuts :( i kinda just want my bro to send me my old one so i dont have to deal with thinking about getting a new one...and dev keeps offering me his tablet but im stubborn and stupid so i keep saying no...i think today he had about enough of it and unfortunately probably wont offer anymore... :) when did i become so finicky?

are you getting an alone dinner with ameya?? how did she get a whole dinner to herself? that doesnt seem fair at all..and i def second the her being jealous thing - you are allowed to be jealous - you have the crush....

rupa!

step away from the computer and go eat something!

hey!!

believe me... that blog was the HARDEST thing to write.. cuz i don't want to see her staying a PC user :) but still...

yum.. i want some brownies.. that sounds good. maybe i should get lunch??? :)

TRAITOR!

you can't go from ibook vs powerbook to DELL!!! you don't get more for your money - you get a dell! no comparison.

julie - congrats on spikey :) i'd like to know the story of the kid. does he have a job? and club promoter - while cool for a weekend visit - is not what i count as a good job. does he support his child? people makes mistakes - its just how you deal with them. i'm two thumbs down if he's not an active part of the child's life. kudos on going to cornell though. major? gpa? long term goals? if he's calling you marriage material, we got to check out his resume too :) someone's got to support you when you decide to move back to miami for no apparent reason :)

umm . . . i think that's it. i just had an hour and a half long meeting with eun - broken up by a 45 minute brownie break for matt from downstair's birthday. yummmy :) plus, extra chatty time with matt, kelly (who is pregnant and sweet and randomly says the most inappropriate things), courtney and gen. i really do like my fellow techs :)

ok, time to be productive!

jules

oh.. i also have a few cents on the julie dating idea :)

i think jules you should keep "talking to" spikey but then go out with joe here.. so you have someone local to cuddle. it sounds like peter is out of the running (he hasn't been even mentioned in the blog in a while).. which i think is good!!!

date joe.. maybe spikey you can date when you are back there.. and the other guy sounds cool too. don't knock him out of the running for being too short!!!

also.. i'm very happy for you that you seem to be meeting lots more boyfriend material guys instead of fun hookup guys :) you deserve some of that ;)

powerbook!

i would vote for the powerbook too.. but if you want more for your money (powerbooks aren't really lighter than PC options.. just much cooler) then i would go for one of those HP ones with the amazing screens.

the resolution on the HPs is really increible.. it's like owning a plasma TV. dells are good for the money but guaranteed your battery will crap out after a year of use and need to be replaced.. i probably know 20 people that have dell laptops and all had the same issue. dells are good.. i have one and i like it :) but i would get the completecare warranty if you get one!!

sony vaio's are really really good for size.. if you want a tiny machine- the only thing is that their batteries don't last very long. i don't mean the way that dells stop working but the actual power life is only about 45 minutes for a sony vaio as opposed to 3 or 4 hrs.

another apple option is the ibook.. which is cheaper and lighter... but still a mac :)

jules- yay i'm glad you are back!!! i think you are right about the moush thing.. first that i should tell ameya and second that i think she is a lil jealous. :) that's a lil weird isn't it? i felt like that too when she was telling me about how i'm just reading too much into what he feels.. but the other thing is that i'm a lil jealous too. she's gonna have dinner with him tonight to say bye.. which made me jealous too.

the funny thing about having a crush is that i'm now being such a GIRL!!! analyzing the most random lil things.. thinking about him a lot... it's crazy. :) at least it's making me smiley and giddy.

nush- what are you doing tonight? can i see you????

dell

i think im leaning towards dell. you get so much more for your money and since i dont need to take my laptop anywhere size/weight shouldnt be too much of an issue...i emailed dev some options so lets see what he say...

get a powerbook, nush!

that's so exciting! jacks and i had fun setting our pwerbooks up yesterday so we can share our songs and pictures and stuff (and dev is awesome for setting up her wireless)! i keep learning new cool things you can do with the powerbook - it's amazing! i also figured out that i could get my gmail on my apple mail also - yay! :)

now i need to convince jackie to buy songs on iTunes so that i can mooch off of her for a while for a change :)

welcome back, julie :)

i'm here and working hard! that's the reason i haven't been blogging. aside from lunch with rupa yesterday, and the 30 min phone convo with my parents this morning (which i hadn't spoken to in like 1 week), i've been trying to catch up to all the work i missed in the past couple of weeks.

nush - i think the sooner you tell dev, the better. if not, he's going to feel upset and deceived that you've made up your mind about what you want, yet you're pretending like nothing has changed.

megan - i'm not dating joe yet. before i left for miami, he said he wanted to take me out to dinner when i get back. i guess i'll call him tonight because i think he might be too much of a wimp to call me if i don't take the initiative.

rupa - i think you should forget about what moush says and tell him anyways. i agree with megan: who do you think knows ameya better, moush, or his roommates? i think she might just be a wee bit jealous because, if he's dating you, then she can't command all of his attention like she usually does when the 3 of you are together.

and now for me: i totally fell in love while i was in miami. ok fine, not 'love', but i'm definitely in 'like' with spikey (his name is alex, i'm sure it'll be easier for all of you to remember him as spikey). nush - you met him briefly. he lives in miami, he's friends with one of our friends, rey, he went to college in cornell. he came over to the apt one night when we were all going out - he was in town for a night. i was showing him the apt, we came into your room and i introduced him as spikey, so he showed you the picture of him in high school when he had a mohawk, which is why we call him spikey. anyways, that's the first time i'd met him. since them, we've hung out a couple of times when i've been home, but nothing significant had ever happened between us. i always knew he had a crush on me, though. anyways, we hung out a lot more this time when i was home. i even made out with him when i was sober! i can't remember the last time i kissed a guy when i was sober ;) he took me to a miami heat game one night, and we had an awesome time. his friends told me that he said to them, "dude, julie's smart, she's cool, she's pretty. . .that's the kind of girl you marry." guys don't usually say that - i thought it was cute. obviously, nothing's going to happen since i'm here and he's there, but it was still a fun 1.5 week fling :) oh yea, there's also a pretty big factor i forgot to mention: he's 23 yrs old, and he has an 8 yr old son. so yea, needless to say, he's not perfect. jackie says she thinks he might be a bit of a player, too. i guess i just liked him because he was really fun and silly - i love guys that are always joking around and don't take themselves too seriously. anyways, he said he'd come visit again sometime, so we'll see :)

i also met a guy who's friends with my cousin, natalia (she's the 19 year old who's a bit wild, came from colombia like 2 years ago, and lives with my parents now). he's actually lived in my neighborhood forever, he's friends with all of my friends in our neighborhood, he went to the all-boys highschool next to my highschool, yet we'd never met. his name is esteban, he's colombian (both parents are colombian but he was born in miami, so kind of the same as me), he's a year younger than me and super short (either my height or maybe even a bit shorter!). if it wasn't because of the height and the fact that he's younger than me, i'd be totally interested in him. he was really cool and nice and sweet, although he wasn't very attractive.

oh well, that's enough rambling for now. dammit, now i need to find time to go back and read all the old blogs. . .

she is a whimp too :)

just kidding - she was just too tired to call him last night...i think he wants to take her out to dinner...maybe one of these days shell get through all her work and say hi to us :)

i could argue one side...i just think someone who is stronger and more opinionate (you and dev) can easily talk me into one side of something...youre right - no law just stick to finance :)

you can't be a lawyer

you have to be able to argue either side! not agree with them both . . . you have to pick one and argue it to death.

that's what i'm doing.

tellhimtellhimtellhim!!!!

ps is julie dating joe NOW??? :)

anusha.prasad@bankofamerica.com

i dont think its just his infectious personality at all. i dont think he would talk to you every night and his friends definitely wouldnt try to distract the sister so you can go in for the kill....

BUT the flip side of Megans ross recollection is that if you do tell him and if he does convey the same feelings - he is going to be in india for a whole year! it may be easier to ignore the feelings/situation until after he gets back...then again there isnt a guy in this world who is better than ameya so maybe it isnt worth ignoring...

maybe this is why im so bad at relationships - cause both sides of every situation seems compelling to me...maybe i should have become a lawyer

excuses!

so - moushumi has a point in that he does sound like that type of person. BUT his roommates pushed you! they see him around different groups of people, so they know if he acts differently towards you/talks differently about you/yells out your name in his sleep.

i think using this immediate deadline is a little cruel for everyone involved - but what if he goes to india and meets someone? hello, do i NEED to remind you of friends?! ross goes off to (insert random country here) and as he's leaving, rachel realizes she loves him. when he comes back, he's dating julie!!!! sure, timing sucks - but it will be even worse to pine away for him for the next year, put him up on a pedestal where no one in your day to day life can compare and then have him come back over you . . .

so, as long as you keep in mind that there is going to be a year of transition period a gazillion miles from each other - and you still believe the alternative is more painful - go for it.

look at me, all handing out love advise :) what, one reasonably successful relationship and i'm suddenly an expert?????

and footnote - i LOVED before sunset. maybe i'm just more artsy than the rest of you and rupa's mom :)

nush's email address

what's your bofa address? i sent that email about the party thurs to "anusha.prasad@bofa.com"

did that work? i don't know your proper email add anymore :)

hmmm....

hi girls! good morning :) megan, i definitely think none of us are working hard enough ;) although jules may disagree... i think we are coffee-ing.. or meeting on david-ing.. or eyebrowing!! like today :) and you two are always blogging :)

but i love it b/c as soon as i open it, there is more to read!!!

nush- i'm sorry you were a wimp.. although it sounds like a good night. have it soon before he convinces you otherwise!!! you gotta be the strong one! go you :)

by the way my mom has started using the word lame lately.. mostly to mean when she doesn't like something.. and although it normally doesn't fit, we rented before sunset on demand the other night and she shut it off after half an hour.. calling it lame. she was right! i even tried watching the first one right before to get into the mood.. but it didn't work.

so yeah.. about me being a wimp... i told moushumi all the drama last night (decided to break outta this whole hiding how i felt with a bang!) and she was convincing me not to say anything. i don't know if she meant to.. but she kept saying that he's just an infectious personality where everyone just wants to be around him.. and she somehow made me think that maybe i'm just dreaming up all the sexual tension? maybe he's just good at making people feel special.. but i don't know... this seems borderline cruel to be this flirty and this affectionate when you really don't feel anything.

then this morning i started thinking that he would never bring this up even if he did like me b/c he knows he's leaving and that's kinda mean to do.. so maybe i should do the same thing and hold off?? i think i'm being a wimp!!!

different situations

its easier to say "let's get started" than it is to say "it's over"

YOU CAN DO IT RUPA!

anusha - do you ever get the impression that either we 1. work less than the other two because we are always there to respond to the blog or 2. we work harder because the reason they aren't there is because they are off getting coffee or having *business meetings* which involve food and drink on someone's expense account?

im a whimp but rupa you cant say that tomorrow!

i didnt have my talk with dev yesterday. it was just too hard to do that after not seeing him for 3 weeks so we just ate dinner watched before sunset (which bored me...) and exchanged xmas presents. he got me really nice speakers for my room. we set them up after the movie, and i got him cufflinks he really wanted and couldnt find in ny. i fell asleep around 12 i think but it was really nice...i know the talk is inevitable but its just so hard when one person (me) is pretty sure it isnt working and the other person (dev) thinks that this is it no matter what...

anyway rupa you arent allowed to use the im a whimp excuse with ameya! can you at least plan a "business trip" to india sometime soon??

that's what i'm here for!!

i'm leaving!!!

:)

i love you megan.. you crack me up.. :) i cracked up just long enough for my boss to walk by and ask if i was ok. :)

oh yeah

and good news on that whole not actually related thing! i was kinda wondering about that but didn't want to ask . . . i figured it was up to you . . . and we'd all just keep our mouths such when the kids came out a little funny :)

not that i wish my friends pain but . . .

i like drama :)
it makes the work day go by so much faster when like every hour or so there is a post that's all *intense*!

LOVE it :)

rupa - you can do it! you are a healthy, well balanced individual who any guy would be lucky to have waiting for him back in the states. i say he is going to be a smitten kitten by the time he leaves for india!!!! of course, maybe the reason that he hasn't had any girlfriends is he's trying to figure out his sexual identity as a homosexual indian man . . . but i'm sure that's not it ;)

i know..

it's always some kind of drama!!! it's crazy. by the way, i don't think i included in my rambling that he is in fact NOT my cousin (we are cheesy movie.. we are NOT jerry springer).

in answer to your questions.. i don't want to have something long distance. especially b/c there hasn't been any relationship now.. i want us to be however we'd normally be.. which i'm guessing is emails and maybe a call or two. but i don't want to tell him on the phone when he's in india and i DON"T want to wait a year... so i'm figuring that at least i'll get it out in the open... and then probably nothing happens for a year but at least he knows what i'm thinking...

as far as the other questions...
i don't know what he's ready for.. b/c i don't think i really want anything to happen. i just want him to know that i like him.. i figured either way he's leaving.. either he's not interested and just a big flirt ;) or he is and he's leaving.. so i'm safe in telling him and then i deal with whatever happens when he's back.

he is normally not-aggressive. i was talking to steve his rommate about this and he was like "you guys are gonna get together but he's too shy to make a move, so you have to". where do i FIND these guys? i don't really know other details..

i know he hasn't dated in forever. he hasn't while i've been living here.. but steve said he doesn't know of anyone that he dated in college either. i never bring it up with him... so i have no idea why. seems odd?

so yeah.. i'm not really sure what i'm trying to accomplish but this limbo stage has gotten really frustrating and i want it to go one direction or the other. so lunch it is...

going away party is now on thursday. :)

your life sounds like a movie!!!

what about if you do some sort relief work in india also?? that would be the perfect end to this story!!! a whole year of you and him away from all the friends and family that keep coming in the way??

talking about it during lunch sounds like a good idea...and a party friday night sounds like a great idea especially if the party is after the talk :)

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

the only question is - who plays you in the cheesey movie?
seriously rups - do you ever have NORMAL guy drama?! he's either gotta be in the same tight circle of friends with your ex . . . or so spineless that he won't make a move . . . or have a sister who either doesn't want you two to get together or has serious subtly issues.

it's almost a little too tragic that he is going away. are you hoping to maintain a long distance relationship when you don't even have a short distance relationship yet? is HE ready? i am at a stratigic disadvantage because i don't actually know him. has he dated at all in the last year? is it normal for him to be non-aggressive? is this a long time unrequitted love, two best friends where one is waiting for the other to realize they should be together? (cough cough - julie and peter - cough cough)

dude, and seriously - what's the deal with the sister? do we need to beat her moment ruining buttocks? (i feel bad swearing on the internet! i almost couldn't type the B word earlier today!)

that's my two cents. it needs to be broad up to him because otherwise it will eat at you all year. but ditch the sis - she's cramping your style :)

and no...

i don't think j and j are official yet ;)

stories part II

ok.. so he's apparently moving at the end of january.. so now i'm thinking ok i really need to tell him soon! this same night, his friends are all talking about the new years party that they are throwing and i keep telling them that i'm not gonna come b/c i have decided to do this whole "doing nothing" night. finally at the end of the night.. we are walking around.. and he's like, i can't believe you aren't hanging out with me on new years! so this is why i decide to go to new years.. essentially all through break i'm thinking about how to tell him how i feel about him, and it's finally new year's eve.

so new year's eve, i first went to anuj's and finally got to this party that ameya had at 11:45. he was worried that i was gonna miss the 12am mark and was happy when i got there.. the only problem was that his sister was there. i like his sister most of the time, but this night, i wanted to be alone with him and my plan was to just kiss him at midnight!! so midnight hits and it's the two of us standing holding hands watching the countdown and his sister comes and gives me a big hug right at new years.. which was nice.. but then all of a sudden it's this huge crowd of people (his friends) who have come over and everyone is hugging and kissing and then i basically don't get him alone again the whole night... at least this night was a lil more forward.. holding hands.. his arms around me when we were standing but nothing where i could just tell him how i felt.. which is finally what i wanted to do.

so we're all hanging out and at some point i go to the bathroom and i'm washing my hands and this girl that he knows is at the sink next to me. i didn't really see her b/c i was deep in thought about when i was gonna tell him and she somehow read my mind and was like "tell him already!".. which i thought was really funny.. apparently it's really obvious that there's something there and she says that the whole night his friends have all been talking about how neither one of us will make a move... so i told her that i wanted to say something but his sister's always there.. so she's like don't worry i'll take care of it.

we go upstairs and she brings over Steve and Jeremy (his roommates) who are the ones she's been talking to about this the whole time and they come over when i'm standing with ameya and his sister and they oh-so-subtly tell her that they want to show her something in the other side of the club.. so she doesn't go at first and then she drags my hand and is like.. lets go see what they are showing.. so i try to play it off but basically she gets that there is nothing to show and doesn't leave.. ameya by this point is super drunk and wants to go home b/c he isn't feeling so hot.. so he tells me he wants to leave and the two of us decide to take a cab to his place (yay!).. we make it outside and his sister and 2 work friends are like.. hey we are coming too.. we end up in this cab and basically they convince us to go to the bar downstairs from his apt.. we are there for a bit and then he's feeling sick again so he asks me if we can go to his place.. we leave to go to his place (yay again thinking i can talk to him now) and he starts puking.. so he's puking for the next half hour or so.. we go sit on his bed and i'm feeding him water and wiping his face.. he grabs my hand and says "you are amazing, you know that".. and shy lil rupa finally comes out of her shell and is like "just kiss him!!" but of course.. everyone comes back at the same time.. all of a sudden it's his roommates, his sister, his work friends and the place is chaos again.. we sat there a lil longer and then finally i left to go home and he went to sleep...

argh!!! so now the india trip is final. he's leaving this SATURDAY!!! (nush and jules- there will most likely be a party friday for him!)... so now i haven't yet told him... although i think it's mutual.. but he's leaving this saturday for a year. so sad.. i think we are gonna have lunch on wednesday so i want to talk to him then.. but it's tough with all the people that want to say bye. that's my story.. sorry to ramble on and on :)

i like him a lot!! i hope this works out b/c it's just been really good with him the last few months.. but it'll be hard when he goes. thoughts? :)

stories

hi all,

here's the rest of my winter break story.... a lil boy drama for you all to enjoy!

so... i've kinda had this lil crush on ameya for the last year (or more!) that i've been good about being in denial about. megan i assume you know who i'm talking about although i know you haven't really met him.. but this is a guy whom i grew up with and have played the "platonic best friend" with for some time now... i've done a good job of denying it.. playing it off as absurd when people suggest that we date.. and always suggesting people to him that he could date.. but then i'm always happy when he doesn't end up dating them :)

so the long version.. which i want to give you b/c i've never told you all and cuz it's all on my mind.. is that last year in december there was some night that ameya and i went out to eat.. we had a fun night.. ended up in his apt and ended up talking at his place until some odd hour of the night.. it was probably the first time that we were touchy feely and a bit flirtatious but nothing really came of it. that was the first night that i was like.. hmmm.. this could be good.. but then the next night i went to his sister's company party as her date. there she was telling people that i was her cousin (as every indian person does) but then she explained to me that we were really cousins.. so i got scared and stopped the whole interest in ameya thing.

so over the last year or so.. ameya and i have gotten really close.. i've started talking to him pretty much every night and it's wonderful. i mean even as just a friend, it's good.. but i've definitely felt a lot more possessive over him than i used to. so this halloween, i went to his party.. we all hung out for a long time.. and same thing.. by the end of the night.. it's just him and me hanging out, usually me laying in his lap and us talking.. for whatever reason nothing else ever happens!!! so since halloween, i've gotten out of denial and decided that i need to do something about this.. something like telling him what i'm thinking.. especially b/c now it's starting to see odd that we aren't dating, but i've always been afraid to talk to him about it.. so every time we hang out i'm too chicken to say anything.. i just am the way i always am.. flirting a lil but then stopping if it's too obvious. i've stopped the whole suggesting that he date other people, which is good.. and i've stopped telling him that he's my cousin (which i also used to do as a way to deflect anything... so stupid!!)

so finally at xmas time i decide to tell him... we have dinner right before xmas and i think i'm gonna say something but we don't get any time alone to do so (his friends showed up). at the same time.. we talk about this nonprofit in india that he's thinking about joining and basically at the same time that everything in my head works out about liking him, he gets this job in india!!!! so.. now this guy is moving to india.. and at the time he thinks it's gonna be the end of january.. i'm posting this now b/c i'm afraid i'm gonna lose it all and at least you can read this lil bit while i type.

is julie dating joe yet?

is the official date scheduled?

yay

jules is here!!! we just had lunch and caught up :)

i just ate lunch

and now i want to go to the little convenience store and get milk or ghetto frap or something . . .

nye - yup, played scene it, scene it disney, and lord of the rings trivia pursuit. it was really nice! everyone won one game (mom, dad, steve, missy, me and cindy - 3 teams of two in that order). edgar came in the middle of scene it. now i know how to turn on the heat and water and stuff at the house - so you guys have to come visit! kissing bridge (ski place) is only half an hour (if not less) away! 3 bedrooms and lots of sleeping bag space!!!

yesterday was awesome - edgar and i slept in (9:30 baby!) then i made us breakfast and we watched red violin. then we got chai and hung out talking for a while (it's been really warm lately!) then we made dinner together (from scratch, actually good!) and watched charmed (my choice) then we hung out listening to music and talking until about 11 - then went to sleep :)

my update

same old here - still on the break with dev, tonight is the night for the talk. obviously no epiphany in my 3 week break, but i think ive at least sorted out what i want and we shall see what he worked out and if we have a happy median...

my parents are still in india - everyone is ok there even though madras is scarily close to the part of india that was hit the worst. my parents get back on wednesday.

my heater is still broken :( but thurs morn im staying home to have it fixed. ill just watch a movie while they fix it :) i saw a cheesy black movie yesterday - breaking all the rules. i liked it - it wasnt a good movie by any definition but it provided precisely the entertainment that i wanted last night...

ok me again

yay!! i'm so glad your mom hugged edgar!!! did you guys hang out and play board games as planned?

i had a really awesome xmas with my family... although i got sick over the weekend (and then proceeded to get my parents and sis sick)- we had a good 5 days together though.. which was long enough to feel like old times when we were all living at home (not like someone was visiting)... we did a lot.. including going to atlantic city and seeing spanglish (good movie, despite all the reviews!!!)

i came back to the city on wednesday night...and hung out with anuj!! (megan- that's the guy i used to call future husband). he sent me an xmas card last week and the return address was something on 86th st!! like 9 blocks from me!! so it turns out he's moved there with joke (that's the girlfriend.. i really like her now.. and it's pronounced "yo-kah"). he's got an awesome place.. we went out wednesday night.. him and 2 of his college friends that i know well- till 5am.. which was awesome, but not good for the cold. :)

thursday night i worked and then went out with him again and met up with ameya.. then friday night (NYE)- i ended up party hopping at anuj's place and then to ameya's party at this bar. more in the next post!!

new years

mine was really fun! edgar ended up coming too - he drove there after work. my mom hugged him when we left :) very good :)

oh what a beautiful morning . . .

so, wearing gloves is a big issue around here. there are areas that you HAVE to wear gloves and there are areas where you CANNOT wear gloves. the idea being - you touch potentially contaminated things with gloves. don't take that bacteria/virus/whatever junk the blood had that you were just working with and spread it over areas where people don't wear clothes. so, this tech from another lab walks through our lab (its all one big hallway) and goes out our door WEARING GLOVES. it got pointed out to dee (the motherly nurse) she just went and ripped him a new one. she handed him a bleach wipe and politely asked him to wipe down the door handle - and any other areas in our lab he might have touched - since it is TOTALLY wrong to touch them with gloves on. he was all "i used my sleeve blah blah blah" and she was just like no you didn't. and you never do - i've seen you touching everything with gloved hands - STOP IT.

ooooh yeah. and that is why courtney and gen lovingly sign all emails/notices "MLB" for mosmann lab bitches.

good morning!

i'm back!!!! actually i was around for most of last week but was swamped and so i didn't read the blog. how fun is it to read 5 million blogs in a row!

i have lots of stories and things to tell as i'm sure we all do. but i hate that nothing shows up on the blog until i write everything so i'm gonna send this in small pieces.

happy new year

i hope you all had fun. dc was awesome :)

no more yahoo email for me at work - part of new year changes :( so just email me at work if you ever need to....