Tonight

So you're not around to be my emotional pillow for the next hour and a half. Maybe that's a good thing though. I gotta get used to you not being around every single time I need you. Though it's fun to call and obsess about the tiniest little thing. I guess I have a therapist for that now!
I am scared about tonight. Worried that what I want to get accomplished won't get accomplished and scared that I will get terrified of the prospects of screwing things up. But I think I just need to relax and concentrate on what needs to get done. Concentrate on the fact that this evening is about me and my needs. Remember that he owes me an explanation for an otherwise obnoxious act eight months ago. And reassurance that no matter how this turns out, I am still a strong woman who will get through this.
I am proud of myself for taking the step to do this. I am awed that I had it in me to swallow my pride. And I am touched that I have amazing support in my life to encourage me to take the steps. Thank you :) You know I would do the same for you, but let's hope I never have to!

Hi back :)
Man, what an emotionally rollercoastery day. I am so glad we have this space together to share thoughts, feeling and sentiments. It scares me somewhat that I have only been in two relationships and have been so scarred...and I'm only 25. But the icing on the cake (mmm...cake) is that I have you to guide me through to write sassy emails to undeserving guys, remind me that there is so much better out there and that I deserve it, and that I am stronger than this and that this too, shall pass.
Anyway...getting away from that- I'm so proud of you for the whole India venture. I think it's so amazing that you are doing this and are proving yourself at not only such a young age, but with such gusto and resolve. Yay!

hi :)